"ENFJ" Themes and Relationships
By Linda V. Berens Ph.D. and Dario Nardi Ph.D.
|ENFJ - Envisioner Mentor
|Likely Social Style:
- Theme is mentoring, leading people to
achieve their potential and become more
of who they are.
- Talents lie in empathizing
with profound interpersonal insight and
in influencing others to learn, grow, and
- Lead using their exceptional
communication skills, enthusiasm, and
warmth to gain cooperation toward
meeting the ideals they hold for the
individual or the organization.
who draw out the best in others.
- Thrive on
- Frequently called
on to help others with personal problems.
Themes and Relationships
for each Personality Type
by Linda V. Berens, Ph.D.
Dario Nardi, Ph.D.**
For Envisioner Mentors, life is a process of succeeding at
relationships. There can never be enough truly empathic
relationships to foster mutual growth. They enjoy the
creative process in many forms and often bring a fresh
view to projects they enthusiastically work on. Realizing
dreams—their own and others’— is what life is all
about. To not have dreams to manifest and a chance to
communicate and share values is to live a life with no
meaning and no purpose, a fate worse than death.
For them, all of life is about the interpersonal,
and they constantly seek opportunities to grow together
through relationships. There are times when they value
logical explanations. Having realizations that foster
development and help them understand why the world is
the way it is helps them lead a purposeful life. Learning
from relationships is important and occasionally painful.
Their thought processes tend to be integrative and
global as they seek to find ways to help others know
themselves and their life’s mission. Heeding the call to a
life work or mission is tremendously important to them,
and they are readily available to others to help reveal
to them their unique purpose. Sometimes they find
themselves knowing what they do not want to know, yet
to shut off their empathic knowing is to shut off a vital
In the interpersonal realm, they often find that their
ease in connecting with others becomes a hindrance to
their own well-being as they get lost in the relationship
and lose sight of their own identity until they learn to
set boundaries. They often use their intuitive intellect
to reconcile the past and the future as they seek to
understand the meaning and significance of life events.
With such a talent for seeing potential in others and
a focus on realizing that potential, they often find living
in the present difficult. By the time an event happens,
they have already lived it.
For Envisioner Mentors, relationships are about
connecting. Life is all about relating empathically,
and people need lots of attention and commitment.
Nurturing relationships is what they live for. There
must be a sense of connection, to feel known,
understood, needed, reassured, and praised. They often
find themselves acting informally as counselors, even
if that is not their profession. And that fulfills their
daily dose of connection. The downside is they can
become overburdened with others’ problems. They
invest a lot in all their relationships, work or personal,
creating a standard others may not be able to return.
If forgiveness, honesty, and consideration are not
present, they work to bring them in. Without them, a
relationship is not worthwhile. For anything to work
with a person, the relationship has to work. When
there is conflict, problems will have to be talked about
and healed before going on. They tend to be open
and sharing, and they expect others to self-disclose,
especially in the interest of resolving issues. They have
a way of getting others to feel at ease and open up.
In their close relationships, they put a lot of energy
into nurturing the relationship. There is a constant search
for the ideal relationship where there is both friendship
and romance with someone they can share everything
with, especially meaning and purpose. Sometimes
they have a hard time separating from their ideal and
objectivity eludes them. The more abrupt style of others
often leads to hurt feelings, which they nurse internally.
Their style is to easily communicate affection and
appreciation with just the right message. Too much time
alone leaves them needy, yet they need time to reflect on
their own meaning and purpose too.
This concludes "Themes and Relationships for ENFJ,"
A Personality Type Description.
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